How could I not get into Advanced Poetry Workshop with work of this level of genuis?

Misspelling intentional. Does it ruin a joke to wonder if people will get that you're joking?

First off, who called me from 314-971-2237, from a noisy place? Anyone? Was that just a wrong number? It sounded like a guy, and really familiar, but it could have been Some Guy, and god knows he and I aren't speaking.

It’sa me, Mario!*

I have limited my sense of beauty
to good things, to good people,
and their curves forever disappoint me--
I long for an angle.
I built a road to suit you, sending it high enough in space
that the urge you get to jump off cliff faces
is no frail thing,
giving it no railings,
so that plummeting is sure.
I wanted to build it of color,
because brick dust rubs my hands so raw that even metal’s silk,
but I’ve forgotten your favorite color,
and can’t be so crass as to ask.
I sculpted it of everything,
and crafted it of nothing.
Hosannah, hosannah
I am your Princess.
And when you, thick, squat, blood red and sure,
riding fast and urgent, exclaiming your joy in the Coming, when you
penetrate the castle’s secrets
and defeat the conquering beast,
(oh, green and scaled Reptile Lord
yellow toothed and lurking
jealous of the pleasures
of my nubile mammal skin)
you will find me pink and waiting,
fuzzed lightly as a Peach.
We will climb the tower, and await the rising sun.

*based on the Nintendo 64 game, with special permission from the Japanese race



Oh yeah, I'm golden.

Wish me luck anyway.

How could I not get into Advanced Poetry Workshop with work of this level of genuis?

Misspelling intentional. Does it ruin a joke to wonder if people will get that you're joking?

First off, who called me from 314-971-2237, from a noisy place? Anyone? Was that just a wrong number? It sounded like a guy, and really familiar, but it could have been Some Guy, and god knows he and I aren't speaking.

It’sa me, Mario!*

I have limited my sense of beauty
to good things, to good people,
and their curves forever disappoint me--
I long for an angle.
I built a road to suit you, sending it high enough in space
that the urge you get to jump off cliff faces
is no frail thing,
giving it no railings,
so that plummeting is sure.
I wanted to build it of color,
because brick dust rubs my hands so raw that even metal’s silk,
but I’ve forgotten your favorite color,
and can’t be so crass as to ask.
I sculpted it of everything,
and crafted it of nothing.
Hosannah, hosannah
I am your Princess.
And when you, thick, squat, blood red and sure,
riding fast and urgent, exclaiming your joy in the Coming, when you
penetrate the castle’s secrets
and defeat the conquering beast,
(oh, green and scaled Reptile Lord
yellow toothed and lurking
jealous of the pleasures
of my nubile mammal skin)
you will find me pink and waiting,
fuzzed lightly as a Peach.
We will climb the tower, and await the rising sun.

*based on the Nintendo 64 game, with special permission from the Japanese race



Oh yeah, I'm golden.

Wish me luck anyway.