The Secret's in the Silence

[x_los]

My mom craps all over me. I cannot go to Detroit, I cannot pick up Colin. I never want to make a plan again. Well, I never want to look at my mother again.

Highlights of my mother's argument:

"We used to do things together! We used to eat meat together!"
"Snarky?! Is that another of your jew-words?"
(Yeah, 'cause she's totally not mad at me for dating Jeremy.)
"If the help wants to complain about not getting Christmas presents, they should just be happy they're not still picking strawberries two weeks straight and getting molested by the farmer!"
"How DARE my mother try to tell me how to treat my domestics!"
(Yeah, kind of non-sequitur to the point at issue? But priceless.)
-Waking up after 11 is lazy and deceitful
-None of my friends like me- they just hang out with me because I'm willing to dirve them places and do things for them. None of my grandma's friends really like her for the same reason.
-In a related argument: My boy friend does not like me. I am clingy, and no one likes that in a girl.
-I should come to M.U. next year. Regardless of what my grades are. Iowa is really expensive. I’m probably going to have to come home. Live at home. I don’t need the car, not really. She wants to take the car.

Comments

[nacilmeiel.livejournal.com]

My lovely comments on this after working in the library and being quite sure the sound on my laptop didn't work yet nonetheless getting my computer to output the Super Mario theme rather loudly. Er, yeah.

Eating meat is the foundation of American society. People who don't eat meat are evil and unAmerican.

Jewish people are also evil and unAmerican. They can also be weird homofaggots and you should watch out for them. Snarkiness is the mecca of all that is untrue to God. Incidentally, it has an entry in the OED:

Snarky, a. Irritable, short-tempered, 'narky'.

Incidentally, the origins are cited as being British primarily (and some Australian), but hey -- they're all Jewish right?

If waking up after 11 is lazy and deceitful, those are some might admirable qualities. If I woke up after eleven, I might be getting more than six hours of sleep. But sleep is laziness and the scrouge of society.

Clingy people are bad. The are made of plastic wrap and do not decompose in landfills. Generally, the plastic does not have the same properties as a human brain, but who would notice the difference anyway? Also, your mom doesn't seem really clingy.

Aah! Do not go to MU. Missouri folk are scary and home folks are scarier. And how is Iowa expensive? *looks at own tuition bill* It really isn't worthwhile. College can be fun, I've seen evidence for it. At home, there's no constant talk of fandom and gaysex. That's not so fun. There's no Neil-worshipping, bad fansubs, ancient console games and MST.

I wish you didn't have such dumb arguments with your mother but you shall be back at school soon. Where people are at least somewhat more normal. I think.

[debatertwig67.livejournal.com]

I was going to post a comment here, but I think yours takes the cake for hilarious sarcasm. well done.

much love to you, erin, hope to see you soon.

[homo-moment.livejournal.com]

Cso ni de MAma!!!!!

aw, muffin!

[grrarghing.livejournal.com]

i totally love you for more than your sexysexy!car. yo mamma is just crazy.

wretchedness

[anyhennypenny.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry your mother is still the Wicked Witch of the West. She looked somewhat promising for a time. Oh well. I guess some things will never change. Hope you're OK, even though I know you're not really, but you know what I mean. Much love-age.