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Nov. 24th, 2004 10:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
x_losGimped from Nicole's blog:
You are Chicago!
What WONDERFUL musical are you?
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I'm a bit disappointed, it wasn't my fav or the possible results.
I'd talked myself, with a lot of help from my mom, into being willing to eat a slice of organic turkey. I felt bad about it, like it would be cheating, but since it is Thanksgiving and since I'm investing butt loads of effort in prep-work, and an organic bird's life isn't exactly horrid, I was resolved, even really looking forward, to enjoying this hallmark o' Thanksgiving.
Schnucks had NO organic turkey option. Not a damn bird. I don't know, I just expected SOMETHING- a free range gobbler lingering around. It wasn't even that they'd sold out, they just never ordered any. This is somewhat my fault for not planning ahead, but it really crimped my style. I'd already had a god awful day, excepting chilling with kel, talking to Danny and Jer and watching Prisoner of Azkaban with my little bro and sis. And there were other important ingredients Schnucks didn't carry, and if they don't have something, certainly no other grocery in town does. Damn it, I HATE it when I have to deviate from the recipe when it wasn't in my plans. Now I'll just look at this perfectly cooked bird, roasted and glazed with pear juice, the perfection of my labor, and not be able to try it.
I know that politically, I'm very invested in the benefits offered by vegetarianism, but frequently this feels like something I’m not doing for myself. I dunno why, it's not like Annie or Jer pressure me. I'm just really bad at denying myself things. It's one of the major reasons I sucked as a Christian when I got to be somewhat older. Stopping myself from having improper thoughts- not so much sexual as jealous or cruel- was way too hard for me, and I insisted on being hardcore about it.
Point is, I've thought until recently that if you're not comfortable and happy doing something, it's probably the wrong thing to be doing. I've lost my ability to sacrifice, to abstain. But the underpinnings of the 'do what makes you feel good' are so self-indulgent, self-interested and Randesque. This whole pesca-possibly-vegatarian thing is just going to take a real paradigm shift.
Thoughts from those of you who have done this would be welcome- I often feel very whiny and alone against the hard-coreness of Jer and Annie. It always seems like their convictions are so much stronger than mine, and I really wonder if it gets any easier. It wasn't so bad until I had a kitchen again- now I really just feel like a failure as a vegetarian AND a cook at once.
My little sis Molly is veggie b/c she hates the taste of meat- she has no convictions against eating it- and so I was unduly snappy with her while we were shopping and she was being a bit snotty about me buying faux chicken broth. I understand that she doesn't enjoy meat's taste. Dandy. But frequently I kind of resent her for not caring that something that comes natural to her- abhorrence of meat- is really a huge struggle for me.
Augh, I'm just so sick. Nauseous and achey, feverish and sneezing. I need bed rest, but have way too much to cook.
I'm worried I'm picking up too many of Jer's habits of speaking. Turns of phrase are fine, obviously, but my sounds of annoyance and strain (think lifting a heavy object)Have lost their drawled O quality (think ooof! as said with slight southern accent) and transmigrated into a weird guttural Eugh! such as he utters.
I've always had a bad habit of talking like whoever I'm with and picking up their accents (I hope to god no one ever sees me around my rural Missouri grandmother- There's shars of flars in the longe (there're showers of flowers in the lounge)). I feel wierd when I realize I'm doing it- like I'm phony or something, though it's not like I'm trying to do it or really realize its happening. And it’s GOT to be odd, or just embarrassing, to listen to. Any ideas as to how to stop this, other than watching All the King's Men and Gone with the Wind daily in hopes of encouraging my drawl?
Addendum: I didn't mean to sound at all wronged by Annie or Jer- the way they manage to actually do something about their convictions is really *I hope this sounds less corny to you than it does to me* inspiring. They're v. supportive, always helpful, and kick bunches of ass. Sometimes this intimidates floundering, early-stage veggie me, and I'm talking about that, not any ill they've done me.
You are Chicago!
What WONDERFUL musical are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
I'm a bit disappointed, it wasn't my fav or the possible results.
I'd talked myself, with a lot of help from my mom, into being willing to eat a slice of organic turkey. I felt bad about it, like it would be cheating, but since it is Thanksgiving and since I'm investing butt loads of effort in prep-work, and an organic bird's life isn't exactly horrid, I was resolved, even really looking forward, to enjoying this hallmark o' Thanksgiving.
Schnucks had NO organic turkey option. Not a damn bird. I don't know, I just expected SOMETHING- a free range gobbler lingering around. It wasn't even that they'd sold out, they just never ordered any. This is somewhat my fault for not planning ahead, but it really crimped my style. I'd already had a god awful day, excepting chilling with kel, talking to Danny and Jer and watching Prisoner of Azkaban with my little bro and sis. And there were other important ingredients Schnucks didn't carry, and if they don't have something, certainly no other grocery in town does. Damn it, I HATE it when I have to deviate from the recipe when it wasn't in my plans. Now I'll just look at this perfectly cooked bird, roasted and glazed with pear juice, the perfection of my labor, and not be able to try it.
I know that politically, I'm very invested in the benefits offered by vegetarianism, but frequently this feels like something I’m not doing for myself. I dunno why, it's not like Annie or Jer pressure me. I'm just really bad at denying myself things. It's one of the major reasons I sucked as a Christian when I got to be somewhat older. Stopping myself from having improper thoughts- not so much sexual as jealous or cruel- was way too hard for me, and I insisted on being hardcore about it.
Point is, I've thought until recently that if you're not comfortable and happy doing something, it's probably the wrong thing to be doing. I've lost my ability to sacrifice, to abstain. But the underpinnings of the 'do what makes you feel good' are so self-indulgent, self-interested and Randesque. This whole pesca-possibly-vegatarian thing is just going to take a real paradigm shift.
Thoughts from those of you who have done this would be welcome- I often feel very whiny and alone against the hard-coreness of Jer and Annie. It always seems like their convictions are so much stronger than mine, and I really wonder if it gets any easier. It wasn't so bad until I had a kitchen again- now I really just feel like a failure as a vegetarian AND a cook at once.
My little sis Molly is veggie b/c she hates the taste of meat- she has no convictions against eating it- and so I was unduly snappy with her while we were shopping and she was being a bit snotty about me buying faux chicken broth. I understand that she doesn't enjoy meat's taste. Dandy. But frequently I kind of resent her for not caring that something that comes natural to her- abhorrence of meat- is really a huge struggle for me.
Augh, I'm just so sick. Nauseous and achey, feverish and sneezing. I need bed rest, but have way too much to cook.
I'm worried I'm picking up too many of Jer's habits of speaking. Turns of phrase are fine, obviously, but my sounds of annoyance and strain (think lifting a heavy object)Have lost their drawled O quality (think ooof! as said with slight southern accent) and transmigrated into a weird guttural Eugh! such as he utters.
I've always had a bad habit of talking like whoever I'm with and picking up their accents (I hope to god no one ever sees me around my rural Missouri grandmother- There's shars of flars in the longe (there're showers of flowers in the lounge)). I feel wierd when I realize I'm doing it- like I'm phony or something, though it's not like I'm trying to do it or really realize its happening. And it’s GOT to be odd, or just embarrassing, to listen to. Any ideas as to how to stop this, other than watching All the King's Men and Gone with the Wind daily in hopes of encouraging my drawl?
Addendum: I didn't mean to sound at all wronged by Annie or Jer- the way they manage to actually do something about their convictions is really *I hope this sounds less corny to you than it does to me* inspiring. They're v. supportive, always helpful, and kick bunches of ass. Sometimes this intimidates floundering, early-stage veggie me, and I'm talking about that, not any ill they've done me.
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Date: 2004-11-25 07:12 am (UTC)Deff. come hang out tom, esp as your fam is so Thanksgiving relaxed. We can check out the parade and suchlike. And bring Anistasia! Or Quest for Camelot, but most especially Anistasia! I have a might need to complain about the sugar-coating of class struggle in a humorously rabid way! Call me when you wake up, and such plans we will make!