The Annals of Steve

This is pretty cut-pasted from my telling Katy and Lori, BUT:

Oh my god, I have a tale for you. A magical nutritive of Steve.
 
So the first, Tuesday: Steve texts me about coming to take his shit and I have to wait around all day for him--finally he says he's supposed to come get it with the police between 8 and 12. No Show for Stevo.

Wednesday--he gives me 8pm for definite. He comes late, with the police, and clears his shit out. MOST of it--there's still a significant amount. INCLUDING 250 pounds and 110 euro. I do the good girl thing, call the police, tell them, take them the money in a sealed envelope to give to him, etc. This feels Just, and like what I would have decided to do anyway, even if Katy hadn't been like 'if you don't you'll NEVER get into Gryffindor!!' when I called to tell her of my discovery of pirate treasure/possibly drug money/a fuck of a lot of cash to just FORGET for someone who was plum about to kill a girl for 140 pounds. Still though, it rankled against the strong, nasty 'blood for blood' element of my personality, and daddy was positive aghast when I said I'd done it. (Q. Are you not a lawyer's daughter? A. We are Devo.)

Thursday, after running them the cash, I cleaned out Steve's room, making a box of household stuff, a bag of trash, and a bag of charity shop clothes, which I've labeled in the front hall.

Steve just texted me, saying that he needs me to arrange a time for him to pick up the ties and shampoo inside the apartment--he doesn't need to go inside, says he.

He's not supposed to be /on the lot/ sans police. He was supposed to be OUT on the 31st, and I've already had to clean the fucker's room. Like, now I'm his maid service?  For /bottles of generic shampoo/? Wtf, he can take the money I gave the police to give him and replace his /two ties and shampoo bottle/.

I reply: "No. You were supposed to be fully out the 31st. Pick up your money from the police and call it done." I'm also not his courier, taking time out of my life to arrange this bastard's multiple little trips over to collect one last thing he's forgotten.
 
Steve texted back: "The ties and stuff are mine. The message you have just sent me demonstrates your unwillingness to cooperate and if necessary can be used against you in court. Your choice... either collaborate or I will come with the police, since am now friends with them... Stefano"

I AM SO SURE THEY ARE FRIENDS NOW. BEST FRIENDS. I BET THEY DO LUNCH. I replied: "When I hear from the police, fine."

As if. I am so not intimidated I could be playing with a beribboned baby lamb named Bo Jangles the Bonny. There is no. fucking. way. this bitch poses any legal threat. He signed no contract, and thus has no contractual rights. He attacked a girl and threatened her with murder, gave the police trouble, and only wasn't arrested because we didn't press charges. AND I gave him his forgotten money back. Wtf ever. If necessary (which it isn't) we can sue him black and blue. The very IDEA that he would try to /posture/ with the police as a threat is an insult to my intelligence, not to MENTION the girl he assaulted and threatened.

 

The Annals of Steve

This is pretty cut-pasted from my telling Katy and Lori, BUT:

Oh my god, I have a tale for you. A magical nutritive of Steve.
 
So the first, Tuesday: Steve texts me about coming to take his shit and I have to wait around all day for him--finally he says he's supposed to come get it with the police between 8 and 12. No Show for Stevo.

Wednesday--he gives me 8pm for definite. He comes late, with the police, and clears his shit out. MOST of it--there's still a significant amount. INCLUDING 250 pounds and 110 euro. I do the good girl thing, call the police, tell them, take them the money in a sealed envelope to give to him, etc. This feels Just, and like what I would have decided to do anyway, even if Katy hadn't been like 'if you don't you'll NEVER get into Gryffindor!!' when I called to tell her of my discovery of pirate treasure/possibly drug money/a fuck of a lot of cash to just FORGET for someone who was plum about to kill a girl for 140 pounds. Still though, it rankled against the strong, nasty 'blood for blood' element of my personality, and daddy was positive aghast when I said I'd done it. (Q. Are you not a lawyer's daughter? A. We are Devo.)

Thursday, after running them the cash, I cleaned out Steve's room, making a box of household stuff, a bag of trash, and a bag of charity shop clothes, which I've labeled in the front hall.

Steve just texted me, saying that he needs me to arrange a time for him to pick up the ties and shampoo inside the apartment--he doesn't need to go inside, says he.

He's not supposed to be /on the lot/ sans police. He was supposed to be OUT on the 31st, and I've already had to clean the fucker's room. Like, now I'm his maid service?  For /bottles of generic shampoo/? Wtf, he can take the money I gave the police to give him and replace his /two ties and shampoo bottle/.

I reply: "No. You were supposed to be fully out the 31st. Pick up your money from the police and call it done." I'm also not his courier, taking time out of my life to arrange this bastard's multiple little trips over to collect one last thing he's forgotten.
 
Steve texted back: "The ties and stuff are mine. The message you have just sent me demonstrates your unwillingness to cooperate and if necessary can be used against you in court. Your choice... either collaborate or I will come with the police, since am now friends with them... Stefano"

I AM SO SURE THEY ARE FRIENDS NOW. BEST FRIENDS. I BET THEY DO LUNCH. I replied: "When I hear from the police, fine."

As if. I am so not intimidated I could be playing with a beribboned baby lamb named Bo Jangles the Bonny. There is no. fucking. way. this bitch poses any legal threat. He signed no contract, and thus has no contractual rights. He attacked a girl and threatened her with murder, gave the police trouble, and only wasn't arrested because we didn't press charges. AND I gave him his forgotten money back. Wtf ever. If necessary (which it isn't) we can sue him black and blue. The very IDEA that he would try to /posture/ with the police as a threat is an insult to my intelligence, not to MENTION the girl he assaulted and threatened.