Considderation

[x_los]

I saw this as a comment in a group I belong to, made by some anonymous individual named saintmichael. I thought it was a pretty interesting commentary. Not the definitive answer to the question, but an intriguing way to look at the difference. Vikki asked me something similar to his a few days ago, and sort of pushed me into thinking in this direction lately.

"Think about sex for a moment. Most people have sex or make love. The difference in how those two are worded is so very important. 'Having' is a passive sort of experience. It almost implies that sex just happens to a person.

This way of viewing sex is, by its very nature, detached. It separates the person from the act. 'Making' on the other hand is an active sort of experience. It is synonymous with creating, planning, and doing.

Avoiding just having sex makes sense for someone seeking a spouse. Seeking to make love makes even more sense for someone seeking a spouse. I'd put all my energy into finding someone to make love with. ;-)"

Rather, instead of a spouse, I would say for someone seeking a purpose. Not that there's anything wrong with those who choose the route of extra-relationship sex; it just doesn't seem to fit with my personality, which has always been very purpose oriented.